Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Back Home

I didn’t really have a lot of time to readjust. The day I got back my dad had tickets to Walking with the Dinosaurs and Carter had his First Communion that weekend and I found out my parents sold the Florida house. Not a lot of time to share stories. But not everyone feels passion for Haiti like I do and I won’t pressure them into listening to me babble. Maybe they will read this. It is amazing that even two weeks later I am still getting stopped everywhere I go. People are interested and positive. Some people, and I expected this, asked how my vacation was or asked if it was a good trip. It was not a vacation and no it wasn’t good. It was an amazing experience and it opened my eyes to devastation we could never imagine. It broke my heart and changed my life. It let me see a people who love and are happy with nothing, happier and more faithful then most of us. It wasn’t good to see people endure such hardships. It wasn’t good to hold orphans sleeping under tents on top of ruble with flies swarming them. It wasn’t good to see people living in the median of main roads. It wasn’t good to see people afraid to sleep in their home. It wasn’t good to see any of this. We all made it back safe and sound. That was good. But the trip can’t be explained as good. An amazing experience? Most definitely. People, I think, need to go through to truly appreciate what they have. But most will not. Most will do nothing. Hopefully they can participate in doing good works in some way, somewhere. To serve the people as Jesus Christ did in a selfless way. I can only hope, for all of us and for Haiti.

People are always surprised at my answer when they ask me if I will go back. My answer is in a heartbeat. I am not sure if they expected me to hate it or if they were surprised a spoiled girl would go again. But I like surprising people. This whole experience surprised me. It was so far out of my bubble, so far outside my comfort zone, so nothing I imagined I would do – but it is in the top five experiences in my life. I think having Carter is the only thing that can top it right now.

Now I am just tasked with figuring out where to go from here and where to put my efforts.

Now almost three and a hold months later I still get stopped, not near as much but still a little, to talk about my experience. My college alumni magazine is going to print some small paragraph about my travels. And people are coming around to the idea of mission work in Haiti in my church. I am still facing the leadership issues, the selfish motives and movement. I am still being ignored when I email some but I am just going straight to our priest now. That seems to be working a lot better.

He is deciding on a temporary committee tomorrow and I wholeheartedly want and feel called to be on it. I am a little nervous about finding out. But Fr. Dave asked me to write something for the bulletin for Sunday. He gave me about seven hours to come up with something. I think it was a test from him, and maybe even God. To see just how dedicated and proactive I can be. I did well. Fr. Dave loved it and it will be in the bulletin Sunday.

I really feel it was a piece that God wanted me to write. I sat down before I started typing and asked God to guide my fingers on the keyboard to put something together for His glory and not mine. To be His message and not mine. To move people for Him and not for me. It really is His words that came out of me I believe that. He was with me every step of the way. I can't wait to see it put in the bulletin and to hopefully see some people changed and wanting to get involved.

So everyone please say a quick prayer that the right people are chosen for the temporary committee. This new ministry needs strong and passionate people to lead, especially in the beginning. So, whether it is me or not, I pray that it is the right people to get this off the ground and moving.

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